New beginnings can be both fearful and exciting. How can we use yoga on and off the mat to navigate the dual emotions change can bring up within us?

I have a few fears—one being large bodies of water. Winter's emotion is Fear. Fear can definitely get your adrenaline going. Funny how my family in Puerto Rico is surrounded by water, and it makes me nervous.

Wearing glasses at an early age and not being able to see much shaped me. At 23, I had LASIK eye surgery. Between the ages of about 7 to 23, I strengthened my other senses. Turning inward and closing my eyes often to train those senses more was how I would cope with my fears.

I remember going to the beach and not being able to take my eyeglasses into the water out of fear of losing them, so I didn’t always wear them. Attempting to look at the blurry ocean was extremely overbearing on my nerves. Thus, I prefer the fresh springs and creeks of the mountains.

Just a little fear surfacing as we will soon be flying over the ocean for our Puerto Rico Retreat in the lovely town of Rincón. We used to play baseball on the beaches there. The first time I wrote my name was during Winter in Aguadilla’s Crash Boat Beach, just after a big wave knocked me down.

As a teen, I attempted to go into the water of Adventure Islands, where the waves are created, and got a bit caught up before climbing out. When I was 20 and living in Arecibo, I was walking along the beach in the shallow area and a rip current grabbed me by the ankles and pulled me under. At that time, I wore contacts, and they got all scratched up in my eyes.

Being that Winter is here and the New Year has arrived with Fear in my mind, how can I use my yoga on and off the mat to navigate my emotions?

So needless to say, I still go into the water—because it is my fear, and it just scares me. I shift fear to excitement and hope for the best.

I take myself into the water and the current of my emotions. They go all over the place—up and down, all around, backwards, forwards—and I dissect everything until I can breathe again. Resurfacing. Anxiety runs into me often, and I don’t like it one bit.

So I do more breathing. I notice I clench my teeth, and I notice my shoulders squeeze in and rise up. So I consciously squeeze them in and move them higher. I unclench my teeth and rub my jaw. And then I breathe more. And more. I take slower breaths, take a shower, and get to know the water more—the water that I was marinated in within Mami’s womb. And I surrender.

And laugh out loud, because laughing is healing, as I think about the bumper we just added to Chris' car.